Nappy Brown’s Football Prognostications: Championship Weekend
Legendary soul-singer Nappy Brown is a bit of a football buff. Every week Nappy will make his NFL predictions..
Championship Weekend
Jan
22
2010
22
2010
Jan
18
2010
18
2010
Starbury’s Revenge
Let’s be clear about this — Stephon Marbury signing with a Chinese basketball team is by far the smartest and most rational thing Starbury’s done in a long time…and we mean looooong time.
And besides, everyone knows China makes the best Vaseline in the world (nope, couldn’t resist).
The man everyone should feel most sorry for right now is Bonzi Wells, who will soon be regarded as only the second best player in Chinese basketball history. Also, because he’s homeless.
Jan
14
2010
14
2010
Nappy Brown’s Football Prognostications: Second Round
Legendary soul-singer Nappy Brown is a bit of a football buff. Every week Nappy will make his NFL predictions..
Second Round
Jan
12
2010
12
2010
Matt Carroll Puts His El Pie In His Boca..
(Maverick Eduardo Najera meets his new teammates..)
Najera: ¡Ola!
Howard: Fuck you call me?
Carroll: (eyes light up) Oh! A Mexican!
Jan
11
2010
11
2010
Jayson Williams Goes To Prison..
(Jayson Williams settles into his bunk, rousing his top bunkmate from his slumber..)
Heene: (rubbing eyes) Mmm, hmm? You the new guy?
Williams: Yup. Name’s Jayson.
Heene: I’m Richard.
Jan
08
2010
08
2010
Nappy Brown’s Football Prognostications: First Round
Legendary soul-singer Nappy Brown is a bit of a football buff. Every week Nappy will make his NFL predictions..
First Round
Jan
07
2010
07
2010
BOOM-SHAKALAKA!!
Clintastic!
In what’s sure to make the day of everyone alive in the mid-’90’s, EA Sports is set to announce the return of the greatest video game of all time, NBA Jam, for the Nintendo Wii. If the thought of sharp-elbowed NBA player caricatures with Barry Bonds-sized heads on Kate Bosworth-sized bodies doesn’t get you pumped, then you were either a deprived child or just aren’t human.
There’s really no way the EA execs can screw this up if they stick with the original formula, down to the George Clinton-style P-Funk soundtrack and the endearingly repetitive, poor man’s Marv Albert announcer. My only suggestion would be having at least one old school player (of the always interesting hidden variety, perhaps) on every team, because quite frankly, I need more of Tom “The Bomb” Gugliotta and Blue Edwards in my life.
Without further ado, I present the three players – since starting with Tournament Edition, teams could make substitutions after each quarter — who should be represented in NBA Jam 2010, along with one old school star in parenthesis. I mean, just imagine Mark Price lobbying one up for LeBron James, or O.J. Mayo feeding one to “Big Country” Reeves. Whoops, bad choice of words there.
(Note that since there were only 27 teams at the time of the original game’s release, I took the liberty of choosing a retired “legend” for Toronto, Memphis, and Charlotte — the Bobcats, that is, since the 1993-94 Charlotte Hornets once featured the epic and my personal favorite duo of Alonzo Mourning and Larry Johnson. Well, aside from the phenomenal Rookie All-Star squad that included the likes of Bill Curley, Eric Montross, and Yinka Dare.)
(more…)
Jan
01
2010
01
2010
That. Just. Happened.
Raise your hand if you thought inserting the most talented offensive player on the team into the game would give the Knicks a chance for a road upset over a superior team.
ALL OF YOU PUT YOUR FUCKING HANDS DOWN!!!
The shine is officially off your apple, Mr. D’Antoni.
