http://lowposts.com where bad puns happen Thu, 11 Mar 2010 17:00:25 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en http://lowposts.com/pete-chilcutt-mix/ Curry: (throwing couch pillows at Zach)  I've had enough of yo carousin'! Randolph: I ain't carousin'! I don't even know what carousin' means! Curry: It means you fuckin' around! Carroll: (turns to Nate)  Well, this is one gosh-darn awkward family dinner! Robinson: No, this has become the norm in the Randolph household ... http://lowposts.com/dads-5/ http://lowposts.com/bffs/ (Mavericks swingman/benchwarmer Matt Carroll logs on to Chatroulette..) Carroll: How's it going, web-stranger? Mason: S'good. Carroll: You seem like a kind fellow. Mason: Show me yo tit-tays! Carroll: (chortles) Mason: What's that? Carroll: I'm chortling. Mason: The fuck is 'chortling'? Carroll: It's like laughing, but funner! Mason: So are you gonna show me your tits or what, lady? Carroll: ... http://lowposts.com/anthony-mason-matt-carroll-meet-chatroulette/ (Caron Butler & Matt Carroll are suiting up in the Mavericks' locker room..) Carroll: So the NBA banned you from chewing straw, Caroniel? Butler: Yeah, it sucks. I love straw! Carroll: Hoo boy. If they're gonna ban straw from the mouth of a semi-star like yourself, imagine what they'll do to an old ... http://lowposts.com/straw-ban/ (Matt Carroll is helping new Maverick DeShawn Stevenson unpack his things in Josh Howard's old room..) Carroll: Man! Lotta white tees! Stevenson: Jeeyah. Carroll: Maybe I'll start callin' you "White TeeShawn!"  (chortles) Stevenson: You call me that, I'll kill you. Carroll: (nervous chortle)  Fair enough! Carroll: You in the mood for a quick game ... http://lowposts.com/deshawn-moves/ http://lowposts.com/george-lawrence-mikan-fucking-radical/ http://lowposts.com/n8/ When Andre Miller, a pass-first point guard who holds a modest 14.5 career scoring average, poured in 52 points against the Dallas Mavericks on January 30, it was one of the most unbelievable statistics in recent NBA history. In the previous three games, he'd scored 15 points combined, and ... http://lowposts.com/50-point-club/ Carroll: I can't believe you're gosh-darn leavin', Joshua J. Howard the Third! Howard: Belee dat. Carroll: Think of all the fun adventures we've had over the years! Howard: Nah, son. I'm thinkin' 'bout titties. Carroll: (chortles) Howard: I gotta go to D.C. now. Get me some Mojo Sauce.. Carroll: I'll miss you, old ... http://lowposts.com/bye-josh-sad-chortle/